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Dear Webby

Dear Webby,

My sister in law, her husband and 2 children were planning on coming here for Thanksgiving. Last month she called and said her husband couldn't get off work so they couldn't make the trip. I invited others to fill my table.

Yesterday she called and told my husband they were going to make it after all. My family is delighted but I think it is not right at this time to change their minds. My table only seats 10 people.

I could understand if this was a picnic but a sit down dinner is different. I want my husband to call her back and say we didn't expect them and made other arrangements. He refuses.

Ruined Holiday

Dear Ruined,

You asked the wrong person! The only thing Webby sees ruining the holiday is your attitude.

Apparently being with you for Thanksgiving was important enough to them to work around and/or change schedules so they could come.

Most letters Webby gets are about family not liking one another. How lucky you are that your family is happy that they are coming. Thanksgiving is a time for family and friends to be thankful and if possible to be together.

Have you ever heard of the children's table or as our webmaster's family calls it, the "Huns" table? We all have happy fun memories of those days before we grew up to sit at the main table.

Your children and their cousins will probably have more fun at the card table than sitting with you adults. If need be extend your table with a smaller table next to it. The new guests will get to know your extended family and be glad they were included.

Webby's family has grown well past the main table, the kid's table and a couple of other tables. We all get to mingle and enjoy one another's company and wouldn't miss it for anything. The seating is minor; the family together is important.

Contrary to what the magazines say, Thanksgiving is more than a beautiful table with a cornucopia in the center. If you're lucky enough to have that, great, but that is only the trimming on the event. The people make it Thanksgiving not the tables.

I hope you will tell your husband you're happy his family can make it. Be sure to make them feel welcome and definitely don't assign all four of them to the Huns table.

Someday when you look back you will forget the inconvience and cherish the memories of a Thanksgiving when family and friends came to your home to share this once a year holiday with you. How lucky you are!

Here's to all that makes Thanksgiving so special to us Americans, even the crowded table.


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